Embracing Self Compassion
Practical tips for daily habits and lasting success
Written by Laura Goodes, Registered Psychotherapist
In the fast-paced world we live in, we often prioritize productivity, success, and meeting others' expectations—sometimes at the expense of our own well-being. Self-compassion is the practice of treating ourselves with the same kindness, understanding, and patience that we would extend to a close friend. This small but powerful habit can transform our day-to-day lives, helping us feel grounded, resilient, and capable.
Let’s go over some simple, practical ways to show ourselves compassion each day and look at the many benefits this approach can bring to our lives.
Positive Self-Talk
Most of us have an internal dialogue running constantly and is often filled with self-criticism or negativity. Notice when you're being harsh on yourself—maybe after a mistake at work or missing a personal goal—and shift that thought to something more encouraging and self-affirming.
How to Practice Positive Self-Talk:
Recognize negative phrases like "I always mess things up."
Replace them with balanced affirmations: "I'm learning and growing from my experiences."
Reframe setbacks as learning opportunities, not as failures.
Benefits: Positive self-talk can reduce anxiety and boost self-esteem. It also helps create a growth mindset, encouraging us to focus on improvement rather than perfection.
Set Boundaries and Say “No”
Often, we overcommit to tasks and responsibilities because we feel obligated to meet others' expectations. However, learning to say "no" and setting boundaries can help us protect our time, energy, and mental health.
How to Set Boundaries:
Identify areas where you feel drained or overcommitted.
Communicate clearly and kindly about your limits with others.
Honor your boundaries by remembering that saying no to others can mean saying yes to yourself.
Benefits: Setting boundaries can reduce stress, prevent burnout, and improve relationships by encouraging mutual respect.
Make Time for Rest and Recovery
Rest isn't just a luxury; it’s a necessity. Taking breaks, getting enough sleep, and even scheduling short moments of pause throughout the day allow us to recharge both physically and mentally.
How to Prioritize Rest:
Schedule breaks into your day, even if they’re just five-minute pauses.
Engage in restorative activities like reading, meditating, or napping.
Listen to your body and rest when you're feeling physically or mentally exhausted.
Benefits: Rest enhances cognitive function, mood, and physical health. Regular breaks can also boost creativity, problem-solving abilities, and resilience.
Embrace Imperfection
Embracing imperfection allows us to accept ourselves as we are. Understand that everyone makes mistakes, and what matters is how we respond and grow.
How to Embrace Imperfection:
Allow yourself to make mistakes and forgive yourself for them.
Celebrate small successes and the progress you've made.
Let go of comparison and focus on your unique journey and goals.
Benefits: Embracing imperfection can increase self-acceptance, reduce stress, and build resilience, helping us move through challenges with grace and optimism.
Practice Mindfulness and Be Present
When we slow down and focus on the present moment, we can appreciate our lives as they are and develop a gentler, more accepting view of ourselves.
Ways to Incorporate Mindfulness:
Breathe deeply and focus on your breath for a few minutes.
Notice your surroundings when you’re feeling stressed or overwhelmed.
Practice gratitude by listing things you appreciate in the moment.
Benefits: Mindfulness improves emotional regulation, lowers stress levels, and helps us cultivate a non-judgmental, compassionate mindset.
Practicing self-compassion isn’t about letting ourselves off the hook or becoming complacent; it’s about acknowledging our humanity and treating ourselves with kindness. When we show up for ourselves with compassion, we become more grounded, resilient, and ultimately, happier individuals. By making small adjustments in our day-to-day lives, we can nurture a kinder, more supportive relationship with ourselves that will serve us well for years to come.
If you struggle with negative, anxious thoughts and would like to learn practices to alleviate them, I can help.
Together, we will explore tools and techniques that will help build an accessible and meaningful self-compassion practice to live with more lightness, grace and self-love.